Forgiving Yourself

Philippians 3:10-14

¹⁰ That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death;

¹¹ If by any means I might attain unto the resurrection of the dead.

¹² Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus.

¹³ Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

¹⁴ I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

Here Paul is writing to the church at Philippi. He says “Forgetting those things which are behind.” It’s really the 1^st step in the healing process is forgiveness. The devil will remind you each and every day of your past if you allow him. Paul had a terrible past. He sought to the best of his ability to exterminate Christians. It conflicted with his Jewish understanding of scripture and he was under the impression that it was blasphemy. That was all until God made a divine intervention with Paul on his road to Damascus. From there forward, the regeneration process began and Paul became a changed man about 3 days later.

Moving forward Paul would always have the thoughts of him persecuting Christians come to his mind. Just as the devil reminds you of your past, he did the same thing with Paul. However, what the devil meant for evil, God will turn it for good. The devil used Paul’s knowledge of the scripture to persecute Christians, but once God plugged in the missing link (Jesus) into Paul’s theology; Paul became probably the most predominant apostle to spread the growth of the Christianity.

What most people miss, is that even in the time of Paul’s persecution of Christians, he was fulfilling Gods purpose. Paul actually caused some of the scattering of Christians across the world. Christians were fleeing him and bringing the gospel to places that never heard the gospel before.

One of the most interesting things concerning Paul’s conversion is his attributions to the death of the first ever martyr; Steven. Paul was there during the murder of Steven. The people who stoned Steven laid they’re belongings at the feet of Paul and proceeded to murder Steven. One thing sticks out. At his stoning, Steven cries out “Lord, hold this not against them.” Is it possible this plead could have been one of the causes for God to pull on Saul; to become Paul? Personally, I think this is very much so.

Because of Paul’s persecution of the Christians, such as Steven, he potentially had a better grasp on forgiveness. If other true and real Christians such as Steven were able to forgive him, and God the creator and savior of the world could forgive him; he could forgive himself into the maturing of what God had called him to do.